photo credit: ssedro
So I’m reading Eat Pray Love
I’m at the part where she is in Bali, Indonesia. And she is describing some of the customers that come to see the Medicine Man. One family is very poor, and come to him because their 1 year old has been crying for days. They bring him 25 cents and a few grains of rice of which he graciously accepts. Later that day a wealthy family comes to him and brings him a huge basket of fruit, and flowers, and a roasted duck of which he also graciously accepts.
It just seems so… what’s the word? Humane! To live in a society where everyone works and pays what they can. Sure, there is a caste system there that would make any American cringe. But really, is it any different from the informal caste system we have here? Yes, we live in the country where dreams come true. But for how many people? Face it, for most of us our destiny lies in the socioeconomic status we were born into.
Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone paid what they could, and there was no animosity that “Why should I have to pay more than that person? I work hard for my money!” or “Why should that person who cannot pay as much money as I can get the same medical services I get?” or “Why should their kids get a high quality eduction like the one my kids get which I pay extra for?”
Instead, can we just have respect for the work that people do and the realization that we all work hard, even if we are not all born into privilege? But that we all deserve certain humane services such as medical care and a quality education?
“You may say that I’m a dreamer. But I’m not the only one.”
-John Lennon
I realize that you could call me a hypocrite right now since we did take Eva to the circus a couple of months ago and she LOVED it. I had never been to the circus before because I knew that their treatment of the animals was most likely questionable but this time we were offered free tickets so I thought “why not”? When we arrived I immediately spotted the protesters handing out fact sheets on the cruel treatment of the animals. I declined to take one because I did not want to know what I already feared in my heart and I wanted us to be able to enjoy ourselves. I know that sounds incredibly selfish and it was but I did vow to investigate before I ever went to another circus and that is what I want to share with you.
Here are some facts about Barnum and Baily from investigations conducted by PETA.
http://www.circuses.com/pdfs/RinglingHiddenTruthFSetc.pdf
http://www.circuses.com/pdfs/RinglingFactsheet.pdf
http://www.circuses.com/pdfs/RinglingElephantBreedingFS.pdf
The statement that affected me the most was this…
“Elephants in circuses are bought and sold,
separated from companions, confined, chained
and forced to stand for hours, and frequently
moved about in small compartments on trains or
trucks. They are required to perform behaviors
never seen in nature. … In order to keep elephant
behavior under tight control in the close proximity,
‘hands-on’ conditions of circuses, it is necessary
for a handler to establish and maintain supremacy.
Domination of such a large animal must
unavoidably involve an element of cruelty, often
including the liberal use of an ankus—a bullhook
euphemistically termed ‘guide’ by those in the
business, a whip, or an electric prod. … The totally
unnatural existence of captive elephants in a
circus, which includes significant physical and
emotional suffering, is a travesty. To allow this
practice to continue is unjustified and unethical.”
What also sealed the deal for me is that the elephants are kept chained up, barely able to move, for an average of 26 hours at a time up to 100 hours while traveling between cities. I mean at least when you go to a reputable zoo they attempt to replicate the animals’ natural habitats, give them room to exercise and good veterinary care. So there it is, do with it what you will.
Here is a list animal free circuses for your consideration.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what is the best environment for my daughter. Let me start by saying that in my young adulthood I never dreamed I would be a SAHM. I always saw myself as a working mommy and denied any wrong in having a child in daycare. I argued that daycare is good for children because they get to learn new things everyday and as long as they are getting quality time with mom and dad at night and on the weekends then it is the best situation. I also just never pictured myself being happy as a SAHM, and I thought that a happy working mom is 100% better then an unhappy mom at home.
My daughter came along…I stayed home for 3 months…went back to work for 10 months…and have now been home with her for 8 months. My reasons for staying home were complex. Although I had a flexible work schedule I was bringing too much stress from my job home. The families I worked with were becoming more and more challenging and the feeling of helplessness was breaking my heart every day. I’ve always heard the average turn around time for people working in social services is 2 years per job. I had been in my job for 3 and a half years. I also thought I was going back to school because with my husbands job I was only going to have to pay 20%. That is too long and depressing of a story to get into here but it didn’t work out.
Besides the stress of work and the promise of becoming a student again I just MISSED my daughter. She was getting to be a really fun age…18 months…and every morning as I got her dressed my heart just ached to be home with her. I longed for afternoon trips to the park and the zoo, story time at the library, lunch dates at the mall, snuggles after nap time. Then there were some complications with her current daycare and that kind of made the decision for me. Enrolling her in another daycare was out of the question. Since she was adopted and had already been through 2 caregivers plus a daycare provider I just couldn’t put her through another big change so soon.
Now that it has been 8 months the monotony of staying home is really starting to wear on me. Being home everyday is not all peaches and cream like I thought it was going to be. You see because my 18 month old little monkey has turned into a defiant 2 1/2 year old. Being the full time mom of a 2 year old takes creativity and patience…two things I do not possess in large amounts. That’s not the only reason I’ve been questioning whether being at home with me is the best for my daughter though. She is a very social person. Slow to warm up but once she does she has a great time. She loves being around other kids, adults, and big crowds. I took her to a playgroup last week and she clung to me the whole time. I couldn’t help but think “Am I sheltering her too much?” “Am I keeping her from all the wonderful experiences she could be having at a child care?” I’m sure at a quality daycare the providers will not yell the way mommy sometimes does. But then they will probably not cuddle her the way mommy does either. “Does that mean I am coddling her then?” “Am I depriving her of learning life lessons without the hovering helicopter mommy watching her every move?” “Am I depriving myself of my career? Of feeling like I am making a difference in the world?”
I don’t have any answers. Just questions. Even with all the questions I am content with where I’m at. I do not regret my decisions or what I’m doing right now I guess I just need to know where all of this is going. I don’t want to stop thinking about my future as not just a mom but a woman who has something valuable to offer society, and I never want to stop learning. At the same time I don’t want my daughter’s world to be confined to this house. I want her to experience new things at a young age. Nuclear and isolated families are something fairly new to humans. I have a strong feeling that it was not meant to be this way. We are social beings and children used to have a lot of people around to play and interact with. Have we gone too far with wanting to shelter our children to our own little world where we can control everything?
I obviously don’t know the answer so what are your thoughts?
I finally watched Slumdog Millionaire last weekend. At first I couldn’t see what everyone was talking about with it being such a good movie. Yes, the poverty was disturbing but it was not news to me. However after watching the whole movie I did like it and I do think it deserved the Oscar.
I remember seeing the kids who were in the movie at the Oscar ceremony and then hearing about how they went to Disneyland the next day. I knew that the kids were actually from the “slums” of India and lived in deep poverty but I was curious what had come of them now? Had they been paid well for their work in the movie? Were they able to at least afford to buy a house for their families to live in?
Today I was shocked and disturbed to read this article that talks about the little boy who played Salim in the movie being homeless after his families shack was torn down. In the article his mother said that the government promised housing for them because of their part in this very famous movie. She says that still hasn’t happened and she asks “My son has brought glory to this country, shouldn’t he get some credit?”
My question is…What about the production company that made the movie?! Aren’t they giving the boy some credit? Was he not paid for his work? I realize that the film did not have a very large budget to start with but surely they have made a ton of money off this movie. Do they have no conscious? Didn’t they think about the hypocrisy when they chose to cast these victims of poverty children in the first place. The article says some people in the media have referred to this movie as “poverty porn”. In that case these children are being exploited, and what does that say for a movie speaking out against victimized children?
I realize that we do not live in a fairy tale world and that the movie was merely reflecting for us the situation in India. Of course even if these two children are rescued from this life what about the thousands of other children living this way in countries across the world? On the other hand two children are two children.
To help children in poverty click here…Children International
To read about the situation in the Guatemala City Garbage Dump and how you can help click here…Safe Passage.
One thing I’m ashamed I don’t know more about is the Supreme Court Justices. Recently Chris and I bought a trivia game and there were a couple of question I didn’t know and it sparked my interest to learn more. I’ve heard a lot this past week how President Obama will have an opportunity soon to appoint a new Justice. Then, today I read this article in which Ruth Bader Ginsburg, the only female justice at this time, suggests that there needs to be another woman on the court. She says that “Women belong in all places where decisions are being made. I don’t say (the split) should be 50-50. It could be 60% men, 40% women, or the other way around. It shouldn’t be that women are the exception.”
I could not agree with her more. She goes on to explain in the article that men cannot understand all issues that women face because they have never had the experience of being female. She gives the example of a 13 year old girl who was stripped searched because a classmate claimed she had perscription drugs on her. Her mother was not called before hand, in fact she wasn’t called until 2 hours later. Imagine at 13 years old being in a room by yourself with adults in authority roles made to take all your clothes off, even your bra. Apparently the men on the court could not relate. Justice Stephan Breyer responded “I’m trying to work out why is this a major thing to, say, strip down to your underclothes, which children do when they change for gym. How bad is this?”
Justice Ginsburg is right having just one female voice on the Supreme Court is not enough. Woman need to be represented there, Ginsburg cannot represent all US women by herself, she is but 1 of 12. As it is she is a 76 year old cancer patient. God forbid something happens to her and then we will have no one.
